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Home / Blog / Does Your Kid Have an Anger Problem in Sports?

Does Your Kid Have an Anger Problem in Sports?

By: Dr. Chris Stankovich | @DrStankovich | Apr 23, 2012

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Los Angeles Lakers player Metta World Peace (Ron Artest for the purpose of this article) viciously blind-sided James Harden in the head yesterday, prompting sports fans worldwide to attack Artest for his aggressive play and history of sport-related violence and suspensions.  There is no doubt that Artest has a checkered past when it comes to keeping his emotions under control, as his record of getting into fights speaks for itself.  It’s also very understandable that many fans are tired of Artest’s behavior, and rightfully so, as a shot like the one he delivered yesterday could have easily have been a career-ending hit.  Looking at the bigger picture, however, it becomes a very interesting discussion when you examine how intimidation, hard (but fair) play, and deliberate aggressive/violent acts all enter into sports.  What’s good, right, bad, or wrong? (Sport Success 360).

There isn’t much debate that Ron Artest has struggled with his emotional development throughout his career — many times admitting to his problems through various interviews over the years.  In fact, Artest has even talked about his work with a psychologist, which I find quite admirable that he would seek treatment (even if he is still showing signs of his uncontrolled anger).  But what about the aggression your child shows in sports?  Does he have an “anger problem,” or is his level of mental toughness good for the sport he plays?  Does your daughter have an appropriate level of intensity, or does she seem to cross the line with occasional cheap shots?  Many parents ask themselves these types of questions everyday, wondering if their child might, too, have an anger problem similar to Ron Artest.

What makes this a challenging conversation in sports is the fact that so many sports are physical in nature — making the “line” somewhat blurry when it comes to appropriate and inappropriate behaviors.  Case in point: If somebody in the office chucked you hard as you made your way to the copy machine, not only would this be inappropriate, it might also lead to that employee being fired – or even sued.  In a sport like hockey, however, players are encouraged to knock down the opposing player heading toward a goal.  Same behavior, yet the behavior is viewed quite differently across settings.

In addition to aggression being a part of most sports, there is also an emotional factor that enters into play that is very different than our day-to day work.  In other words, many athletes become emotional while being in the heat of a battle, and quite often they engage in physical play through the emotional experience.  Occasionally, they cross the line while in this mind state.  Of course, this doesn’t justify “cheap play,” but it may help us understand some of the contextual cues that enter in to aggression in sports.

When it comes to your child and sports aggression, ask yourself the following questions to see how he or she sizes up:

  • Is her aggression usually tied to winning the game (i.e. blocking a player out under the rim, or checking a player into the boards), or is it tied to simply being frustrated (like hitting an opponent after the whistle)?  The first type of aggression is instrumental aggression, while the second is called hostile aggression. If your child regularly engages in hostile aggression, you might want to pay close attention to the situation to see if she might need help with controlling her emotions.
  • Does your child regularly seem to be in the middle of fights while playing?  Sport psychologists will often look at prevalence and trends when it comes to aggression in sports, and if your son is seemingly always in the middle of scuffles there could be a problem.
  • Has your child been disciplined for sports violence/aggression before?  If so, and he continues to display the same behaviors, you may want to seek professional assistance as it appears as though the consequences are not curtailing the behavior.

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aggression, artest, metta, peace, psychology, ron, sports, violence, world

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Dr. Chris Stankovich

Dr. Stankovich has written/co-written five books, including Positive Transitions for Student Athletes, The ParentsPlaybook, Mind of Steel.

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