Coaching your child in sports can be a really fun experience, but it can also be a very stressful one if you aren’t prepared. Filling out lineup cards, making substitutions, and developing game-plans are a big part of youth coaching, but so, too, are managing parental expectations, egos, and differences in opinion about your coaching abilities. When coaches prepare to deal with parents the result is usually a good experience for all; unfortunately, when coaches fail to prepare they “prepare to fail” when they are accused of sports politics and feel defeated by the experience.
If you are an adult interested in coaching your child’s sports team check out the list of sport psychology tips and reminders below designed to help you have a safe, fun, and meaningful coaching experience:
- Do your homework. Make sure you know about the sport you are coaching, as well as any new rule changes that might have occurred since you played the sport. Most sport rulebooks are just a click away on the internet and can be downloaded quite easily — you can also check with your league operator for more information.
- Learn whether your league is a recreational or travel (more serious) league. These two types of leagues differ in expectations quite dramatically – in most recreation leagues the expectation is that all the kids play, while travel leagues tend to promote a more “only the best kids play” philosophy.
- Develop a talent evaluation rubric. Some coaches are fortunate in that starters are decided based on objective results (for example, two kids can wrestle and one kid will eventually emerge as the winner). For other sports, however, coaching decisions are more subjective in nature (like trying to decide the best soccer players to play). Astute coaches will develop a simple scoring system and share this with parents (and kids) so that everyone knows exactly what is being evaluated (leading to playing decisions on the field).
- Have a pre-season meeting with parents. Make sure to discuss all team rules and policies, especially around how parents can communicate with you (and be assured, they will want to talk – especially if their child isn’t playing).
- Provide feedback. While some coaches have a zero-communication policy, my experience has shown me this only infuriates parents even more and almost always fuels the “politics” fire. Try instead to provide a few insights about the child and how he or she can focus on specific skills to improve the chances for future playing time.
- Recognize & reward kids. Make coaching fun and be sure to use positive reinforcement whenever you can! Remember, kids play sports to have fun, but this starts with you and the energy you bring to the field.
Being a youth sports coach can be a terrific life experience and a very unique way to bond with your child. This opportunity, however, can be squandered if you are not prepared for questions and concerns around your coaching style and coaching decisions. Do your part by being prepared and bringing positive energy to the field everyday!
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