Improving mental health does not come about by means of simply what you refrain from, but instead includes all the things that you proactively do each day to feel good. In other words, enjoying positive mental health is an active process, and not a healthy state of being that just “happens.” While we often talk about staying away from unhealthy living experiences to improve mood state (i.e. don’t eat poorly or you will have low self-esteem, and possibly experience depression), we talk far less often about the things we should be doing to improve mood state (i.e. exercising, cultivating strong relationships with others, etc). This seemingly simple paradigm shift is desperately needed in this moment, as healthy living is achieved just as much (or more) from what we do, as it is achieved by the things we do not do.
The process of positive mental health
While it is true that some people wake up each day and naturally feel good, most people have to actively work at doing the things necessary to experience a healthy mood state. For example, completing a daily workout and spending time with a family member or good friend are two quick examples of things that make us feel good —- but also things we need to prioritize and actually do. Positive mental health, therefore, comes about by means of how we think and spend our time, and we have a lot of control over doing those things!
When we talk about improved mental health for kids, the same concepts ring true as far as being proactive with healthy choices. In this very moment, however, the biggest challenge for parents trying to help their kids experience better mental health begins with steering kids away from sedentary (and often isolating) technology experiences (i.e. staring at smart phones, gaming, etc), while encouraging real-life, interactive experiences (i.e. going to the local pool, or joining a school/community organization). At risk of being too simplistic, my experience has shown that by just getting kids up and out of the house (away from screens) they almost immediately experience a bump in mood state! When kids get with other friends, they physically move their bodies, laugh together, share life experiences, and bond together —- all things that contribute to better mental health!
Again, enjoying positive mental health is an active, daily process, and not something that just passively “happens.” Take note of how your kids spend their time, especially as this applies to going outside, interacting with others, exercising, and expressing their creative personalities by means of art, music, sports, and other life experiences. Are your kids doing things each day to explore the world around them, or simply wasting days away by staring at smart phones, or dedicating hour after hour trying to beat a video game? You don’t need to be a psychologist to see the best ways to experience life comparing between video games, and living in the real world interacting with others.
Final thoughts
Improving mental health is an active process! Make it a point to audit your life activities and see how you stack up when it comes to actively experiencing the world around you, and do the same for your kids to ensure they are also getting the most out of life. Passively scrolling on phones and shooting bad guys on video games adds little to improving our mood state, but being active with our bodies and interacting with others in healthy ways can really help! Take ownership of how you feel by means fo the choices you make each day, and model those behaviors for your kids to benefit as well.
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