As a mental health clinician, I often meet with people challenged to overcome life hurdles. Setting aside the psychobabble, and speaking frankly, I have learned that often in life we simply need to “get a win,” even if it is relatively small. For example, if you just experienced difficulties at work, a health scare, and an unexpected bill all in the same week, you can quickly see the value of winning one battle to gain control again. Often when things start to feel overwhelming, suddenly everything feels out of control, leaving us with nothing more than pessimism and despair. When we feel as though the world is collapsing around us, that’s when winning even one battle in life can mean so much. Our mental health is largely dependent on our self-confidence, and when we do not feel as though we have been winning much it becomes quite easy to fall into a funk. This week we’ll explore the significance of winning a battle, and how you can immediately get started.
Play to win, not to avoid losing
Experiencing a downward spiral in life is never fun, but the longer we live, the more likely we will eventually have “one of those weeks” (or longer). During these moments it just feels like nothing will go right, and you often sit and wait for the next shoe to inevitably fall. While there is no magic bullet to pull us from tough spots in life, it is important to remember that efforts to stop the bad momentum and reverse course are very worthwhile. This is where getting a win is so important.
For the purposes of this discussion, you might think of a “win” as simply something that you cross off your to-do list, perhaps a task you have put off for awhile. Examples might include finally cleaning out the garage, rekindling an old friendship, or paying off a bill that has been sitting around. As you can see, “wins” are metaphorical and used in the sense of completing things that have been on your plate, and/or that you have ignored but shouldn’t. While cleaning out the garage might not have anything to do with overcoming sad feelings relating to a recent breakup, it can serve as a start, and a place to re-center and feel a sense of satisfaction in completing a task. From this starting point, a play to win mindset can begin to push bask the play to avoid losing mentality, providing for a greater chance of improved mental health.
Below are a few ideas to help get a win:
- Create a list. What needs to get done? What have you been putting off for too long? Take out a sheet of paper and write down a few tasks that you know you will feel better completing.
- Don’t think, just do. Rather than weigh out all the negatives of getting started, simply get started! Dive in, head first, and get a win!
- Physically mark off your accomplishments. As you complete a task make sure to scratch it off your list. Yes, actually strike a thick line through the goal to show that you have finished.
Final thoughts
Go on, go out and get yourself a win today! When trying to change course in life, and move onto a better and healthier mindset, you have to start by getting a win somewhere. Fortunately, these “wins” do not need to be dramatic, they just need to be tasks that you can face and complete. As confidence increases and anxiety decreases, overall mental health is improved, and the chances for future happiness and success increase.
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