As a mental health clinician who specializes in sport psychology and meets with student athletes daily, it’s safe to assume I have “seen a few things.” This week I would like to offer thoughts on some of the more common issues and concerns I treat, and provide insights to how your family can steer clear of future problems. Youth sports can be one of the most influential physical and mental health experiences your child has while growing up — for better or for worse — making it an important experience to get right.
A lot has changed in youth sports, even in just the last ten years. Youth sports continue to be more of a business, and the expectations we place on kids continue to increase in intensity. Below are clinical insights and experiences I have had in youth sports that are designed to help you with your unique family decisions and future goals, while also boosting your child’s mental health:
- Know the realities. Before jumping into youth sports it is important to understand what you are signing up for, including the odds relating to your child’s long-term sport experience. While millions of kids sign up to play annually, only about 5% of all high school student athletes will play well enough to advance to college athletics, and only a mere fraction of those athletes will play professionally.
- Don’t sign up for everything. Over-scheduling in youth sports has become a real problem, as increasingly more parents regularly overbook their kids with multiple sports at the same time. When kids do not fully commit to one team, they leave the coaches and their teammates in tough spots — including possibly being forced to forfeit because of not having enough kids to play.
- Prioritize and manage schedules responsibly. Again, kids simply cannot do everything, all the time, making it important for parents to prioritize schedules, communicate regularly, and even prioritize downtime for rest.
- Emphasize effort. While your child might not always make the winning play, she should always be praised for her effort on the field. When kids are recognized for trying, they experience better focus, increased motivation, and greater resiliency.
- Reward and use positive reinforcement often. Catch kids doing the right things and offer hearty praise! In fact, set up future goals together with your child, and reward accordingly once the goals are met.
- Allow the coach to coach. While it is easy to call, text, and email the coach regularly, this is not advised. In fact, meddling parents not only make sports tougher for their own kids, but they can cause damage to an entire team.
- Watch for sports burnout. With more kids now training year-round, it should not be surprising that more kids today experience sport fatigue, exhaustion, and burnout. Vary schedules, take time off, and consider mental health options when you see signs that your child could use a break.
- More isn’t always better when it comes to sport performance. Human performance is interesting to study as “more” does not always equal “better” when it comes to training. In fact, the inverted U hypothesis posits that human performance peaks at a certain point correlated to human arousal, and that more effort actually leads to lesser results.
- (Bonus). Identify and use athletic transferable skills. Your child may very well likely learn more life skills from sport participation than she will from any other experience in life, and these skills include communication, conflict resolution, focus, and resiliency. Help your child realize these important skills, and how to apply them to school, future careers, and life.
Final thoughts
There’s a lot going on in youth sports right now, with general trends pointing toward greater intensity and more opportunities to play year-round. Unprepared parents may find themselves challenged dealing with busy schedules, sport burnout, and the difficulties of advancing in sports beyond high school. These are very different times compared to generations of the past, and depending on how parents direct their child’s sport experience it can result in either a great growth opportunity, or a very frustrating experience.
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