“One size fits all” might works for ponchos and ski caps, but it does not work when employing strategies to address the stressors you face on a daily basis. Similar to how there are different drill bits to select from depending on your need, there are different stress coping responses to use when dealing with stress. Some stress is chronic (ongoing) and very predictable, while other stress in our life is acute (in the moment) and random in occurrence. In order to handle stress in healthy and productive ways, we need to be sharp in how we appraise stress, as well as the ways in which we respond to permanent and random stressors.
Assessing stressors
One easy way to approach the stress you experience in life is to categorize your stressors into predictable vs random stressors. With predictable stressors, we are afforded the opportunity to prepare for them in healthy and effective ways. For example, if you make a daily commute that includes expected traffic, how can you prepare for this potential stress? Perhaps leave earlier, take a different route, or maybe find something that puts you in a great mood (a fun podcast!) before facing the clogged traffic. Much of the stress we experience in life is predictable, allowing us to get a head start on how we might respond — a big advantage when dealing with stress! Other additional predictable stressors include the weather and the seasons (i.e. preparing for winter), bills due at the end of the month, maintenance costs with our car, and the fatigue we may experience at the end of a long work day. None of these events are surprises, so we can get a head start on them by preparing ahead of time.
Random stressors, on the other hand, are near impossible to plan for and require a different approach. Examples include a flat tire, an unexpected thunder storm, a broken furnace, or a computer glitch. When we prepare for predictable stressors, we have more focus and energy to devote toward random stressors, providing for better coping responses as the cumulative effect of “everything piling up” simply does not happen. For example, if you have managed the traffic jam and paid your bills on time, you are in a much better mental state to handle the unexpected — including surprise stressors like an unexpected injury or power outage at home.
Managing stress is always challenging, but if you can chip away at some of it by breaking down predictable and random stressors, doesn’t it make sense to do so? Stress coping relies largely on perception, focus, predictability, and efficiency, and we become better in these areas when we break down our stressors accordingly.
Final thoughts
Often when we experience stress in our lives, it feels like it’s all coming in at the same time and with the same challenges. Interestingly though, that is not the case, and that we actually experience both predictable and random stressors in our lives. By better preparing for the predictable stressors we experience, it gives us more energy to devote to those random issues that pop up each day. By exercising control over our stressors, we gain confidence, improve focus, and ultimately galvanize our resiliency — all qualities that allow us to use stress for life success!
drstankovich.com
